Being the subject of ridicule, and a target for bullies makes you insecure, it makes you question yourself on a daily basis. Why am I like this? How can I change? How can I make them stop? First thing I did was realize one very important thing; it wasn’t me it was them.
This may sound like some worn out cliché, maybe something your mom or dad might say which would make you sigh so loud every window in your house might shake, but let me tell you something, it’s true. Sometimes clichés are clichés for a reason, and this is so true here, and when I figured it out, it was a biggest revelation for me as any I ever had.
After this thing just got a little easier, I stopped avoiding them; I stood up for myself. You wanna make fun of my “onion seller” freshly grown mustache, bring it on! Suddenly all those jabs, all the times they made me feel worthless, all the time they made me retreat into my darkest thoughts seemed irrelevant. It wasn’t me. It wasn’t my fault.
At first, this only made them angrier, of course, made them meaner. If you think my life was hard before, they made sure it was ten times more so now. I learned to surround myself with more supportive people. It used to be just Mark and me, but soon a ton of us started hanging out together. Confident now, more than ever, I was gonna make it through high school alive, and I went on, with a new sense of confidence, to college.
Eventually, they just stopped, and started simply ignoring me, as they did anyone who wasn’t up there on the “social ladder.” You might think I hate them, that every day I plot my revenge on them like a weird cartoon villain (yes I still rock a mustache, and it’s glorious), but no. Not me. All I feel is a sense of gratitude, despite everything, even when I would stare at the ceiling wondering why I still thank them! Without them, I wouldn’t find out what real friendship is, and how to look for one.